The ubiquitous couples’ meme:

What are your middle names?
J-Alisia

D-William

How long have you been together?
We met at the end of October 2005 and I think our first date was in November. Hold on, I’ll ask him. Dave says: “It was, um…might have been. I think so. Or close to it. When was…? Yeah.” Believe it or not, that quote was verbatim. Anyway, that makes 3.5 years, about.

How long did you know each other before you started dating?
Not at all. That’s what happens when you crash into someone at a bar. You either hit it off or you never see them again, I imagine.

Who asked whom out?
Well, I did ask where Dave and his friends were going after the bar that night. And he said, “I’m just gonna drive my friend Sung home.” What a pickup line, right? But no, he called the next day to ask me out.

How old are each of you?
me-28

D-the big three-oh

Whose siblings do you see the most?
My sister, because she lives the next town over. However, for Dave’s 3 sibs living a decent distance from us, we’d already seen one sister and one brother on separate occasions HERE IN BOSTON by mid-February! We try to get to New Jersey every two months, although that’s hard now with a baby…aaaaand now I’m rambling.

Which situation is the hardest on you as a couple?
Having a baby, but not the baby part–the figuring out how to give each other some much-needed support and relaxation time when we are both hurting for it, me as a newly minted stay-at-home mom, him as the token bring-home-the-Bacos breadwinner.

Did you go to the same school?
I went to Michigan two years after Dave went to Northeastern, so no.

Are you from the same home town?
No, but we overlapped in Boston for two years when I was finishing high school and he was starting college. We like to think maybe we passed each other a couple of times, although, let’s be honest, he lived in Mission Hill amid the gunfire and I lived in Brookline amid the, um, synagogues? Therefore, we probably didn’t.

Who is smarter?
SO EASY! I am, at anything humanities- or language-related, and I have a sharper memory. He is, at anything having to do with math or science or technology or navigation.

Who is the most sensitive?
I am certainly more outwardly sensitive, but Dave is just a bunch of goo on the inside. OK, there’s just a little goo, but it’s there.

Where do you eat out most as a couple?
When we USED TO eat out, D’s favorite was Pizzeria Regina and I liked Cheesecake Factory, and we both have a soft spot for the S&S Deli (Cambridge) and In a Pickle (Waltham). Those days are but a memory now. Sigh.

Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple?
Italy. Also, this question should read “farthest,” since it means literally how far have you traveled, whereas “furthest” puts it in metaphorical terms, like “That is the furthest thing from my mind right now.”

Who has the craziest exes?
We could argue this one for hours, but let’s call it a tie.

Who has the worst temper?
I do.

Who does the cooking?
I cook dinnner; Dave bakes treats. Our respective recipes of note are stuffed shells and chocolate chip cookies.

Who is the neat-freak?
Dave more than me, although I actually like cleaning–it just falls to the bottom of the priority list, so mostly I make lists of cleaning tasks and when to do them, and then I don’t.

Who is more stubborn?
You know that saying, “Would you rather be right or would you rather be happy?” And how it’s supposed to make you realize that you’d rather be happy than win an argument? My feeling about this suggestion is, why not be happy because you won the argument? I mean, it’s a win-win!

(I am.)

Who hogs the bed?
Dave, but it isn’t his fault, being such a tall fellow. He takes up space, I steal the covers.

Who wakes up earlier?
He does. 

Where was your first date?
It was supposed to be F1 racing in Braintree, but I had to stay late at work that night so we went to Antonia’s in Davis Square instead. 

Who is more jealous?
Let’s see. Am I more jealous that Dave gets to drive a total of 1.5 hours in a car BY HIMSELF, sweet lord, the freedom! Or that he gets to interact with people all day long? Or that once in a while he even sees his friends–our friends–during the workday to EAT LUNCH?

Or…is Dave more jealous of me, that I get to witness every tiny moment of Will’s life, get to see every smile and smooch every tear away? Is he more jealous of me because Will falls asleep more readily in my arms, because I know all his noises by heart?

(The answer is, I am more jealous. I am more jealous because at the end of a very long Friday, when I changed Will’s diaper only to watch him release a spray of rather chunky poop all over his new diaper, my hand, the changing table and…wait for it…the NURSERY CURTAINS, Dave was cheerfully pulling into our driveway, probably thinking about sugarplums and puppies, and he definitely had no poop on him at all, anywhere.)

How long did it take to get serious?
We were spending all our time together by December ‘05. Moved in August ‘06. Engaged January ‘07. Married October ‘07. Had baby September ‘08. I like to think we progressed in nicely timed units, which is weird robotspeak for “not too fast, not too slow.”

Who eats more?
Dave, but we’re probably neck & neck if you take out the male/female variable.

Who does the laundry?
I do.

Who’s better with the computer?
It’s a toughie, but I’ll give this one to Dave, who has the word WITHIN HIS JOB TITLE whereas my computer knowhow extends as far as accidentally shutting down my laptop and announcing angrily that “something’s wrong with this stupid thing.” I must add, though, that I am a much faster typist.

Who drives when you are together?
Dave, because Will’s carseat causes the front passenger to be hunched up against the windshield with absolutely no leg space, and Dave’s legs are about four feet long and simply don’t fold up that easily. And recently I’ve been struck with a smidge of unexplained highwayphobia*, so I’m happy to hand over the keys.

*The lanes are too big, the cars are too fast, and I am too small. That’s all I’ve got so far.

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